Between Ideals And Reality
by ShikisaiMoments
Summary: It's best if you've watched/read all of Death Note or the manga, just because of the name spoilers and stuff. From Mello's point of view. NOTE: I don't know what's going to happen, I'm making it up as I go along.
1. Chapter 1

Harsh words pierced the dreary silence and echoed round the empty train station. I remember looking down, twisting my fingers together, trying to ignore the woman stood over me, shrieking all sorts of horrible things. How could she say such horrible stuff? I was barely five years old, not even started school yet.

When the woman stopped to draw in breath, I raised my head and started screaming bloody murder. She grabbed my shoulders and tried to cover my mouth with her hands. Her long, red nails scraped my cheeks painfully, but I pushed against them in a desperate bid to get free. Saliva spattered my face as she started screaming, drowning out my pitiful wails. I heard a train rumbling down the tracks.

_Please, please let it stop here! _I thought, but it whizzed past in a moment. One moment could have made such a huge difference, maybe stop me becoming as screwed up in the head as I am now.

Just then, the mad woman bent down to my shoulder. I thought she was going to pick me up for one scary second. But all she did was simply whisper 'Sweet dreams, Mihael.' in my ear. I stepped back in shock when her claw-like fingers gripped my waist, off the platform and onto the tracks. I landed on my back, but quickly scrambled to my feet and ran over to the platform edge. The madwoman was laughing at my fear and panic arose when I heard the faint sounds of a train clattering towards us.

'Hey!'

My heart skipped a beat. Someone had heard us! I might escape a tragic death! I kept screeching whilst the security guard wrestled with the woman, acknowledging the fact the train sounded very close by now. The guard slipped out of the woman's' reach and jumped onto the tracks to get me. She came down too. She was gripping the guards sleeve like her life depended on it.

Oh, the irony.

Almost as soon as I was up on the platform, the train shot out of the tunnel like a bullet. A terrible crunching sound ensued, along with splatters of blood and the last remnants of a crazy woman's scream dying out quickly. The edge of the platform was dripping with blood. It had gotten me as well, but I didn't care. I sat on the floor, well away from the edge of the platform, and waited until someone came to find me.

A shadow of the child that had been there just minutes ago.


	2. Chapter 2

An evil cackle floated over to me, carried by…wind? It must have been, for although there wasn't any sort of wind blowing, I was alone. I was alone in a white room with nothing but a big, padlocked door and a small, square space on the opposite wall where a window might've been. Inside the space were two colours, black and grey, all swirling around like clouds in a thunderstorm. It was mesmerising.

At a closer look, the walls were see through; the pure white clouds outside made them appear white. I could just make out silhouettes of people walking past. When I rubbed some of the condensation from the inside away, the people became clearer, but not one of them stopped to look at me or talk to me. They couldn't; when I noticed the shine bouncing off of the box (although no light source was visible); it appeared I was in a large glass box. I almost felt longing to reach out and touch the fluffy cotton candy clouds. _Where was I?_ I thought. _Is this Heaven? It certainly looks like it._

Seconds after thinking that last thought, I chuckled to myself. _Don't be stupid,_ I thought. _Why would I, of all people, go to Heaven?_

No. This was my happy place.

A place where I didn't have to hide myself from anyone else, where I could act exactly how I wanted and no one could stop me. It seemed perfect; there were people I recognized walking past, through the clouds. Some were people I considered friends, others were the people I despised; I could shout at them, swear, spit or kick at them, and they wouldn't notice. Only one thing stopped me shouting to a black haired boy dressed in basketball gear. A noise echoed throughout my box; no one outside seemed to have heard it, or be affected by it. It sounded like a crow laughing, but I knew this wasn't the case. I heard this laughing every night.

It belonged to that…woman.

My mother.

My eyes snapped open and I sat up so quickly I felt dizzy. I looked down at my pillow, spattered with tiny droplets of blood, and then at my hand. Teeth marks and dried blood littered the space between my thumb and finger. I sighed and wipe my fingers on the duvet cover. Stupid dreams.

I got up and immediately walked over to the desk in the corner, where a can of soda was from last night. It was flat, but I didn't care, I still drank it down in about two gulps. My mother's laughter was still ringing in my head; it was driving me crazy!

_Why don't you just go away and leave me in peace for once?_

I gritted my teeth and scrunched the empty can of soda in my fist. The metal split and cut my finger, but I didn't notice. It just added to the bloody teeth marks and various scars from my cat, Rosie. I hated the name, but I hadn't called her that myself; Rosie was the name given to her by Misa Amane, who'd given her to me in the first place. She said she'd given me a cat to try to get me a hobby. Apparently I didn't do enough outside the house, and what hobbies can a cat get you anyway? I just laughed at her. I spent every day trying to get away from this awful house, even if it was only to Lights house with his fussy mother and annoying little sister Sayu. His father worked for the Police force, so I rarely saw him. The only times he seemed to show up was to give Light and Sayu their allowance and to buy them all sorts of stuff.

Now _that's _a real father.

No one was in downstairs, not even Rosie. I found a note from the nanny/au pair my dad paid to keep watch on me, which simply said she was seeing her sister in town today and could I be a sweetheart and eat at a friends' house?  
I threw the note back onto the table and grabbed a slice of bread from the breadbin. I ate it with chocolate spread buttered thick on both sides. _'A moment on the lips, forever on the hips!' _a sarcastic voice trilled inside my head. I smiled and swallowed the rest of my breakfast, before getting up and heading out of the door.

*

I met Light at the school gates. He was talking on his brand new cell phone, facing away from me and his voice was hushed, as if describing a family of terrorists to the CIA. I poked his arm when I reached him. He almost jumped a foot, but smiled wearily at me when he saw me. I shook my blond hair out of my eyes and looked up at him under my fringe. 'Who was that?' I asked. Light yawned and rubbed the back of his neck. His eyes were dull, tired, as if he'd been up all night. 'Why do you want to know? It was just Misa. She's not coming in today.' he said. I half grinned as he tried to close his mouth, despite the massive yawn issuing from him.

'Late night, huh, Light?' a low, flat voice from behind Light made us jump. A mop of black hair and large, tired eyes loomed over Lights shoulder. 'L! Don't sneak up on me like that!' Light turned around to face L and folded his arms over his chest. L stared blankly back at him.

'_Was _it a late night with Misa?' I asked.

'No!' Light said quickly, going a bit pinker than usual. 'I was just awake studying.'

L rolled his eyes behind Lights back. I smiled at him and we all walked through the tall iron gates. The grey, bleak grounds of the public high school we attended were full to the brim with students talking, laughing, first year boys running around after soccer balls and fourth year girls eyeing up all us older boys. A girl with short black hair and glasses giggled and nudged her friend when L walked past her. Light flicked his hair at her and gave her a crooked smile. I snorted when no one paid any attention to him.

'Mello!'

I turned and scanned the tarmac for the person who shouted. I heard running footsteps behind me and small, cold hands slip over my eyes. I smiled and reached up. Hard, plastic goggles. I smiled.

'Hey, Matt.'


End file.
